We're Heading to Insanity
by SunShower
Summary: Sirius Black is the most ignorant jerk on the planet. You really don’t need to know anything else. Except that it makes me the biggest idiot on the planet because I fell for him. SBOC, JPLE


**Disclaimer:** This goes for the whole story so I don't have to keep posting it. I do not own Harry Potter or its characters. They are the ingenious creation of JK Rowling, I'm just borrowing them for creative purposes.

**A/N:** Ok, so, exams suck and study sucks and I found writing fanfiction to be much more enjoyable. So… Most probably any time I really really don't feel like studying (which is all the time) I'll be writing. I'm determined to finish this one so… yeah.. here we go.

**Summary:** Sirius Black is the most ignorant jerk on the planet. You really don't need to know anything else. Except that it makes me the biggest idiot on the planet because I fell for him.

* * *

I always think its best to start any story from the beginning. However, to start this story from the beginning would require me to cover seven years of my life in detail. So instead, I'm starting from the seventh year. Which starts, oddly enough, just as I turn seventeen.

I suppose it would be rude to keep you in the dark about the other six years so here's a quick recap.

Sirius Black is the most ignorant jerk on the planet.

You really don't need to know anything else.

I am deadly serious (no pun intended), actually that brings me to my other point. What sort of a name is Sirius. Really… _Sirius?? _What were his parents thinking? Not to mention any conversation with this guy is impossible, purely because of his name. He either sits there making faces at you, or keeps making jokes and when you tell him to be serious he gets this stupid grin on his face and goes 'I am Sirius.'

ARGH!!

But anyway, back to what I was saying… why you need to know nothing more than 'Sirius Black is the most ignorant jerk on the planet.' Well, in first year I was just like every other girl in Hogwarts (ok, so, at the time it was just every other girl in first year because really… as if a seventh year would… anyway…) and was completely in love with him. The way his long dark hair fell into those gorgeous grey eyes… that cheeky grin he got when he was about to do something to get him into trouble.

Of course, it was all fine then, because part of his charm was that he didn't really know how hot he was.

That changed the year after. It was like a light bulb suddenly went on in his brain and he discovered 'Hey, I'm the hottest guy in my year' and Sirius Black's Hogwarts domination began, as even the new first years realised his good looks.

Third year was even worse. I mean it. It was the beginning of the broom closet era, which, without surprise is still going to this day. For our amusement, me and my friend Lily decided to count how many time McGonagall or Filch caught him, 32 times exactly that year. And only twice with the same girl.

However when it came to fourth year I was left alone to count how many time Sirius ended in detention due to a broom closet. Lily was left with her own troubles. James Potter: best friend to Sirius Black, had decided Lily was the girl he was after. So while I was counting (and from time to time secretly- so shhh- wishing I was one of those girls) Lily was slapping James and trying to teach him the meaning of the phrase 'No, I will not go out with you'.

Fifth year was when that dreaded crush from first year came back to haunt me. I was convinced that Sirius was nothing other than a good looking jerk. A good-looking jerk who only got more and more good looking with age. It was annoying really, if he had been one of those kids that started out everyone saying 'ohh… he's gonna be a looker' but really turned out butt ugly, life would have been easier. So, first term back, fifth year, Sirius decides I'm the girl he just has to have and well… I caved after two weeks. Lily still hadn't caved into James after a year, but me, the weaker of the two of us caved after only two weeks. It was a matter of days (I mean it, second day of our supposed 'relationship') and we were caught, by McGonagall, in a broom closet. This seemed to bring me to my senses and I haven't talked to him since (not including the occasional 'up yours Black.')

Sixth year introduced one Remus Lupin, also friend to Sirius Black and James Potter, into my life. He came back to school a total hottie. I mean it. I accidentally bumped into him, literally, on the train and didn't even recognise it. I believe the conversation went a little like this.

"_Oh, I'm so sorry I uh…" (That's when I actually looked at him) "I… uh… you… um... new?" _

_Then he furrowed his eyebrows in this cute way. "Sorry, what?" _

"_You, are you new? Here… to Hogwarts I mean?" _

He laughed and shook his head. "No, but that is a bit insulting. I mean, we were potions partners in fourth year."

"_We were?" _

Then I slapped myself and realised it was Remus Lupin. I mean really, talk about WOW!!! So I was completely over my brain freeze of liking Sirius Black (who by now had _every _girl in the school- including the seventh years- pining after him) and was completely and utterly in love with Remus. Of course, I knew it would never happen and to this day it still hasn't.

So that brings us to here, today. I'm standing on platform nine and three quarters, waiting for Lily, who is still rejecting James. I'm still completely in love with Remus Lupin and I've just seen Sirius Black, already with a blonde bimbo hanging off him.

And why on earth is he approaching me?

Then I heard two voices behind me.

"Why hello Lily dearest. Fancy seeing you here." James, trying to be 'charming' he needs some lessons.

"Yes, it's such a coincidence seeing me here on the only train that goes to my school." Lily replied dryly.

"I have some good news."

By now I'd turned around to watch. Lily's face lit up.

"You're going to leave me alone?"

"Better than that."

Her face fell.

"Dumbledore has decided to make me the new head boy." He continued. "And I noticed straight away that badge that you are the new head girl, which means, my Lily flower, we will get to spend a lot of time together."

Now there was something strange about this. Firstly, Dumbledore was giving us students, yet again, something to question his sanity. James could_ not _be head boy, and secondly James referred to Lily as… well… Lily… up until then it had always been Evans.

However, this strange occurrence of James calling Lily by her first name went straight past her and she looked outraged.

"Head boy? _You're _head boy?" He stood there grinning and nodding. "This is unbelievable. I saw the badge but I thought you'd stolen it from Remus or someone. You're really head boy?" She asked.

He nodded again. "Padfoot, my man, back me up here?"

Sirius (who was now standing behind me, minus the girl) nodded. "It's true. Dumbledore is mad."

Lily let out a frustrated scream. "I can_not _believe this. Why? Why do you of all people have to be head boy? I was so looking forward to this year and now its ruined."

I saw this as the moment to step in.

"Uh… Lily, lets get on the train."

She looked at me as if just realising I was there. "Oh, sorry Em, I uh… should we go?"

I nodded and Lily went to pick up her bags; however, James was holding them with a stupid grin on his face.

"I'm right behind you." He said. "And don't worry, I have enough muscles to carry your bags."

As we got on the train Lily murmured in my ear. "I'm going to go insane."

I couldn't agree more. Insanity was defiantly where we were heading.


End file.
